Do you consider yourself reliable? Reflect on the numerous times you’ve committed to saving money, shedding pounds, or organizing that cluttered kitchen drawer. Chances are, you’ve made countless commitments to yourself and haven’t kept most of them.
You do this every day. It might be as trivial as telling yourself, “I’ll start my work at the next commercial break,” only to see the break pass by while you renegotiate terms with yourself.
This pattern has its repercussions. You are effectively teaching yourself that your commitments don’t need to be taken seriously, and that it’s permissible to disappoint yourself.
Believing in and trusting yourself is crucial. After all, if you cannot trust yourself, whom can you trust?
Implement these methods to maintain your self-promises and enhance your integrity in all life aspects:
- Learn from your history. If you previously aimed to lose 50 pounds and fell short, consider setting a more achievable goal. Losing 10 pounds five separate times equals losing 50 pounds in one go. Commit realistically.
- Document your promises. Thoughts are a funny thing. They sort of feel real, but they sort of don’t. Writing them down is more concrete. Keep your written promises where you can see them regularly. Review them a couple of times each day.
- Gauge your sincerity. Deep down, you know how serious you are about your promises. After making a commitment, genuinely ask yourself if you mean it and attentively listen to the response. If you realize you won’t honor it, pledge something else.
- Rethink your self-promise philosophy. Most people find it easier to keep promises made to others than to themselves.
- Some part of you believes that it’s okay to let yourself down. If you believe that you matter as much as everyone else, this attitude won’t be acceptable to you.
- Embrace the discomfort of commitment. Why don’t you keep a promise? It’s only because doing so is more uncomfortable than not doing it. So, it stands to reason that if you were better at dealing with discomfort, you would keep more of your promises. When you’re feeling uncomfortable, be determined to work through it.
- Avoiding discomfort or confronting it is a habit. Build the habit that will serve you the best. Dealing with discomfort is among the most valuable skills you can build.
- What would you think of someone that made promises to you and broke them regularly? Would you date that person or call them your friend for long? You think less of yourself when you break a promise to yourself.
- You can see this by considering how you would think about someone else doing the same to you. You wouldn’t think much of them. That’s what you’re doing to your opinion of yourself. Nothing good comes of this. You might not notice it, since it’s happening every day.
Keeping promises to yourself is generally more important than keeping promises to others, yet we tend to approach life from the opposite perspective. The damage you do to your relationship with yourself affects every part of your life.
Treat yourself like you matter and respect the promises you make to yourself. The integrity you build with yourself will make you better at keeping all of the promises you make. It will expand into everything you do.
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